Antiverse: The poetry of Magus
Music, here: Flagship
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goodbye to long loved lover…
of mind
of body
of soul comfort
a simple adieu will never do
i had to learn of your blues
before i could come to our parting
with my new lack luster ontology
i will reflect
on my past respect
for you
and what you meant to me
we danced on the threads of being
auriferous sight,
through the succulent sight
of your superior seeing
last night i dreamed of monsters
but while i was awake
my mind was subservient
to your subsequent safety;
many daydreams did you bring me
in baskets of gold weaving
but now, my mind troubles
at the thought of retrieving you
and your sorely, of late,
soft company...
which has become sharp
and obtrusive
these days, since the
course of my ways
has drifted
away from you,
my former confidant
i have betrayed you
in some sense,
since i have outgrown you,
i now must disown you,
no longer a jewel
but a weight
no longer the earthy giver
of the delighted light of life,
my freedom of a wife,
full of discourse
and ideas
i will send word of your purpose
through my travels,
the undertakings of my soul
seen hereafter without you
i will miss you sorely,
though i may tolerate you
no more
by Kevin Trent Boswell, aka Magus
See more at:
http://www.facebook.com/MagusBoswell
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http://www.flickr.com/photos/conjurework/
http://www.flickr.com/people/conjurework/
http://vk.com/kevin_trent_boswell
http://www.tumblr.com/blog/magus-72
http://www.youtube.com/c/MagusBoswell72
http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCm_GmeGcSi4h2zbzC8vypwQ
http://www.numberonemusic.com/magusandtheplasticinfinity
http://twitter.com/ConjureWork
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Support the work at Patreon
untitled
I believe
you will awake
to a sadness
in the morrow
of the time in which
I have been gone
a long, long while…
to something cold
beneath your sheets;
something you do not
remember putting there
the pebble dropped
into the pond
forms no circle
of waves,
instead… fanning out in
98 degrees
of an angry, broken
heat signature
you will find,
instead,
something that you
brought back
as a door prize,
from the tavern
of decapitation and
capitulation,
where the heads
of cheap beers
are shaved off,
like the skullcaps
of French royalty
your revolution, however,
is even bloodier in spirit
these powers
you thirst for
will not be worth
the cover charge;
the price
is your
renunciation
of all things
generally regarded as
good
and worth
suffering for
the bonds of this
power you crave
are chains of bloody sinew
and gristle
tying murderers to
stakes of addiction
on the third level of
Dante’s Inferno;
a pit of never ending
hunger for flesh
I trip clumsily over these
circular thoughts,
the devil’s shoestrings,
falling headlong into the pool
of fetid memories
when I once again break the surface,
piercing the thick film of slime
for a gasp of dank, unsatisfying air
I climb out, exhausted and
lie still for hours,
attempting to regain
strength and will
I’ve heard it said that
everyone has
a measure of
something we might call
psychic ability,
a gut-level understanding
of truth,
not apparent
but obvious, still…
mine has told me that
I am a miserable fool
if I waste
one more drop
of my now weakened love
on your failure
if my love
was valued
at a dime,
then
you stole
at least
a quarter’s
worth
My name is Magus (Kevin Trent Boswell) and I am a poet, conjurer, guitar teacher and musician.
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night, for you
who have lost
the firm grip on your faculties
for you who have witnessed the slow spiral down
of your most earnest desires...
night,
for you
this false calm,
this seemingly warm blanket
thrown over you
shuts out sight and feeling
beneath the cover of darkness,
you rock like a madman in
a fetal-position,
jealous, murderous thoughts
reeling
and the angels march by you
unseen
and shake their heads in pity,
lamenting that there is
nothing they can do
for you
your fire has waned
your soul gone sour
and spirit all spoiled
unfit to be enjoyed,
or even thrown
to the dogs
night for you
others carefully flit in and around your path,
paying close attention
not to tread the same steps as you
a primal sense of alarm
fear, that this fate
might befall them too
a surety of disaster
out of respect for your passing
beyond the great beautiful light of life,
they speak no words aloud
but only mumble silently
and hold back tears
not that you are dead in any legal sense,
but certainly pressed hard
into the ground of your own fear,
stubbornness, myopia, lack of faith
and lack of love
for yourself or anyone else
night for you
when handed the chance to grab the
gauntlet and fight for the expression of
who you were,
faltering pride swept you away
in the slack-jaw slobber
usually reserved for children
but exceptions made for the old,
the infirm, and now
you...
night,
is there,
for you
a kind of vacuum forms in the throat
before the tears escape
and throw themselves down to their deaths,
the tears are not yours
but those of ones who loved you
strike that,
those who love you still,
no past tense,
for you are not dead
and theirs is a love that
would hold,
even were that storm
of mortality
to tear at the hinges of your existence;
their gates would not weaken for the enemy
but they would stand the pounding,
the hurricane grinding that is
all those mortar and pestle,
hand wrenching, heart pains
that we feel when the image of one we adore
is pulled from our picture frames
and placed into the flames
that love would hold fast...
but it has not sustained you
through your darkness
it has not been the flame,
nor the candle,
nor the match
you have resigned yourself,
despite the best
of efforts
and so night,
for you,
is come
we hold our silent,
invisible vigils,
cry at our wakes
and clutch our prayer beads
at the feet of various saints...
but they kick them back
and make dismissive remarks
about jurisdiction
we too readily and unhappily
understand that the dawn is ne'er to come
until the dawn is made to come
by you
and while we wait,
there is
nothing
but night
My name is Magus or Kevin Trent Boswell
You can become a patron of my poetry at Patreon:
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happy, clueless pilgrims
venturing to the Amish land
awestruck by the death of leaves,
the strength of autumn’s hand
noses pressed excitedly
to panes of auto glass
cameras cocked and loaded
shooting horse drawn buggies, as they pass…
rudely slapping their unwilling victims
on to sheets of Kodak flypaper
at the expense of a simple, private people
they'll have volumes of self-involvement to savor
My name is Magus (KevinTrent Boswell) and I am a poet, occultist and guitarist
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Years ago, my aunt was working for a small town newspaper and informed me that they wanted a poem to print for Christmas and urged me to submit something.
I chose to use the opportunity to hone my writing, to see if I could write something very traditional, like you might see on a Christmas card. So I penned this piece and they did in fact publish it.
Those of you who have read even a few of my other works know that this is not typical of my writing style. Still, the sentiment is there. I do love Christmas and what it's supposed to be.
So now, I offer this verse to all of you. May your holiday celebrations (whatever your traditions are) be full of joy and love.
Christmas
T'was ne'er the thought
Of Saint Nick’s arrival
With stockings full
Of shiny toys
Nor in the least
The Christmas feast
That filled my heart
With season’s joy
Nay, my brother
I tell you true
'Tis not the tree
With lights aglow
I shiver not
At romantic thoughts
Of kisses sweet
Under mistletoe
Though the sacred rites
Hold much weight
Though they may contrive
A special glee
Without contrite
I may tell you right
They hold something
Else for me
Indeed I say and
Mark me well
The warmth of hearts
Is enough for me
For the essence in rhyme
Of Christmas time
Is embraced within
The family
Forget not your brother
Who holds less fortune
Though he be a stranger
Give 'till it hurts
I tell you then, and
Only then, my friend
Shall you receive
The joy this holiday asserts
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caramel
is your color
i keep
your memory
in my mouth
a warm,
candied piece
of indescribably
delicious
recollection
You can read more poetry by Magus (Kevin Trent Boswell) over at www.theplasticinfinity.com and listen to the music at www.soundcloud.com/kevin-trent-boswell
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being in the presence
of a lady,
I tipped my ski mask
and bowed politely
to her cat,
whose name was %
orange clusters of galaxy
spun slowly
in my glass
as we slid bits of
innuendo
back and forth
across the snow-covered,
kitchen floor
a couple of
two foot tall tornadoes
gathered up all the questions
and nailed them
to the ceiling;
they dripped
a honey-like residue
on the hippo’s head…
into which the monkey
dipped his gold doubloons,
before flinging them
out the window,
into outer space
the lady never so much as
batted her exquisitely
sexy eyes
our woman of wormholes
and broken windows
displayed her
potential pleasures
under thin plates of emerald,
microscopes facing out into the ether,
telescopes facing inward
to the singularity
and nine, single eyes
looking in no particular direction
the angels
caught in between
merely waved
a thoughtless,
casual hello
a sudden snapping of her fingers
and a quick,
temperamental glance
indicated a sudden change
in mood,
this signal
summarily summoning
a small army of tigers
who ripped the jukebox into
small
pieces
and devoured all the
bad magick
in its darkened soul
taking up a red pencil,
she drew a shaky line
down the middle
of the table…
it promptly fell in half,
every plate and saucer upon it
bursting into flame
and dust
and applause
when her smile threw its wave
of dizzying heat over my wearied face,
I spoke slowly and clearly
through the haze,
cordially calling
this delightfully curvaceous
debutante by her
customary title of
Ambiguity
but she corrected me,
saying that she
no longer answered
to that name
and instead,
she now goes by
Authority,
which is short for
trouble,
like you’ve
never known
Hear music at www.soundcloud.com/kevin-trent-boswell
See videos at www.youtube.com/c/MagusBoswell72
Purchase music at www.cdbaby.com/cd/boswell
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there are better ways
to spend your saturdays
than how i spent mine
this rainy june morning
children run between the monuments,
collecting feathers
dropped by the ducks
who wander around the pond
in their merriment, the children are
completely and blissfully unaware
of the meaning behind
all this mourning
More work by Magus (Kevin Trent Boswell) at the following sites:
https://www.pinterest.com/conjurework/
http://www.theplasticinfinity.com
https://www.instagram.com/conjurework/
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Adorning a cliff
Dancing in feathers
More than alive
His spirit spills
About the rocks
Red clay Earth
A mountain’s length
Beneath him
The color of descent
Catching hinted shadows
Of his winged colleagues
Conversing w/ sky
Yes,
More than alive,
Transcendent
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Last night, I played my guitar on Front St. and it was one of the best times I’ve ever had. Being a street musician is called “busking”. It’s something I do every summer, here in Wilmington, NC. I usually make somewhere between $20 and $200, for about two to four hours of playing. This particular evening, I only made about fifty bucks, so it was not the money that made it a good night. Instead, it was the quilt of human experience that covered the evening, softening all the troubles that had brushed up against my world.
I only have one rule over which songs I’ll play. The rule is that either I can find my way into the headspace of the song… or I don’t play it. If I never again played Sweet Home Alabama, I could die a happy man. However, if it’s clear to me that knocking out a sincere version of it will make someone’s entire week, then I can get into that. I can play and sing that song that I’ve played hundreds of times before and do it right.
But if I’m not feeling it, I will offer a suggestion of something else. I’m pretty good at finding a song that will make everybody happy. Last night, I guess I was in a wide-open mood, because there were no songs that I refused to play; every song spoke to me, as if playing it for the first time.
I played Elvis’ “Dixie Medley” for a guy from Louisiana, who was missing his wife and thinking about his uncle, who was dying of cancer. He sat there enchanted, truly hearing every note, every word, although I played it quietly and sang softly. His eyes were transfixed at some indeterminate place in front of him. A few motorcycles roared by and sexy girls in short skirts swarmed the street. Yet, he was unmoved, nothing defied the spell.
When I was done, he stood up slowly, solemnly looked me in the eye and said “Dog, that was worth a fiver.” He dropped the wrinkled bill into my case and walked off, as man does when he has found the faith to wake up and face the light of the coming day.
A history teacher sat with me for a few songs, his new girlfriend close to his side, their hands interlocked in a way that made everyone around them feel less lonely, if only for a moment.
He piled ones into my little collection of currency, because I played Can’t You See by The Marshall Tucker Band. He smiled excitedly and repeatedly remarked how this experience, of being here at this time and listening to me play for them, had made his night. His praise transcended the superficial pandering of requisite manners. It was as if he were simply thanking himself, for having the good sense to stop and pay attention… this is a true compliment.
An old friend of mine came by and paid the twenty bucks that he had owed me for well over a year. He’s a good guy and I knew he’d square it up, eventually.
A pretty girl kissed me on the cheek and shined a very sweet smile on me, for the duration of Shooting Star and Rocky Raccoon.
There is an older gentleman that I had seen around town for years. He had a goiter growing out of the side of his neck, the size of a small melon. He was always quiet and wore a polite smile, a badge of quiet dignity. His humble face demonstrated to me, his will and willingness to continue under incredible duress and to do so with dignity. Yet, no matter how gallantly he tried, he could never fully conceal the pain of his daily embarrassment. The obvious sense of ostracized loneliness stood out, almost as boldy as the goiter itself.
But recently, he had it surgically removed. Now, it is completely gone and the scar is barely noticeable. He has been dressing more stylishly and he seems to be more active, animated and happy.
Tonight, he was in front of the coffee house, sitting on the bench, talking excitedly with some friends about this and that. A hundred passionate statements erupting from him, about as many different topics. Hidden beneath the veneer of useless current events, the central point, the crux of each declaration was “Look at me! For my name is Lazarus and I am yet alive!”.
Down the street, a dirty, disheveled, homeless man found a box of pizza that someone had accidentally dropped, face down on the pavement. They had abandoned it there, writing off the loss as collateral damage for an evening’s merriment. Now, one man’s garbage has been alchemically transmuted into another’s golden, cheesy gourmet. To a hungry man, even dirty food is delicious, when laid on the table next to a silver platter of starvation.
He looked up at me, completely absorbed in his banquet. He was holding three slices in one hand, all still connected at the crust. He waved his hand and the slices at me, as if they should not be separated, announcing loudly and joyfully, “Pizza!”. It was his proclamation of “Eureka! I found gold in them thar streets!”.
The way he was looking at me in ecstasy of devouring, you’d have thought that I had given the gift to him, personally. That kind of gratitude is too often in short supply. Most folks get queasy, merely contemplating the kind of grit and filth that must have been smashed into that pie, the dust and dirt, working their way into the depths of the marinara sauce, bits of tiny gravel, now wedged into the pepperoni. But nothing could possibly interfere with his relishing in that found meal.
Earlier today, I spoke with a beautiful young woman at the City Market, downtown. She was selling hats and pouches, hair bands and hand-carved flutes from Africa. Her eyes sparkled so much that I literally couldn’t tell what color they were. All I remember about her is dark hair and a breezy, summer spirit. It was not that I was attracted to her. I was not so much smitten, as I was confused or bedazzled, even. It was the feeling that people describe when being in close proximity to elves and fairies. It wasn’t that she was pretty but rather, I could not decide for myself whether or not she was real.
There were other bits of good news, peppered throughout the day. A dear friend got the really good job that he has been after for many months. Two of my casual acquaintances settled an old dispute and are talking again, with civility and respect.
Now, as I pack up and head back home, I can hear bits of music from the bars, wafting down every street. I couldn’t escape it, if I wanted to. The guys playing that music, many of them don’t know what a privilege it is, to have those indoor gigs that they so take for granted. It’s nice to be out of the sweltering heat and to be not immersed in that cold stream of callous jerks, flowing down the block, in both directions, simultaneously.
The drunken sharks, the pickpockets and con artists… these are not all that bad. They might even bring a bit of useful color to the canvas, here and there.
What I mind most are the soulless trolls, unburdened by imagination, the ones who consider street musicians to be less than human. Truth be told, they don’t actually have a real concept of humanity and are therefore incapable of considering anyone to be either human or inhuman. To them, there are only desperate mounds of insects, clawing their way through tunnels of boredom and frustration.
Unfortunately, so many people have been taught that street buskers are not real musicians, regardless of how good they are. Sadly, they never bother to question this odd notion. Often, even those who themselves play music for a living, don’t understand what a tremendous honor it is to play music for anyone, anywhere, for any reason. It is, to my way of thinking, a type of sacred act, like making love or teaching a child to play a game.
It is a religious experience to break the silence, a kind of reverent prayer, wrapped in devious blasphemy. The incredible wellsprings of pride which bubble up during these elated ceremonies, are matched only by the gut-wrenching humility which lurks below the high wire, waiting hungrily for the next mistake. You get to be a god and a buffoon, sometimes within the space of a single song.
It’s disappointing that so many players just don’t appreciate having the inside gig, being out of the weather and having electrical power for an amplifier and a sound guy to make it all balance out, just right. The simple pleasure of being able to walk 25 feet to a bathroom and not having to take your instrument with you or ask a friend to watch it for a few minutes. These little amenities can go quite a long way, indeed.
Of course, the flip side is, they will never see the spectacle that I witness, out here. They miss all the smiles and the warm recognition of the nice, friendly people passing by, the ones who are in the know, that wondrous zen cloud of appreciation for all art and those who birth it. To see the faces of those child gods, their bright souls, unobscured by harsh lighting, clouds of cigarette smoke and bursts of fractured anger, this is a per diem that is not offered by any indoor club I’ve ever played in.
To sit on a modest dairy crate and to sit there with happy people, who left their homes and found parking on a crowded Friday or Saturday night, downtown, just to come and sit with me, on an even more modest sidewalk and listen to my silly little songs. Their complete and utter refusal, to view this world as an unending bitterness, their saying of the courageous no, to an experience of loss and instead insisting upon the reception of a divine gift, this reveals them for the sublime creatures that they are.
Their failure to see life through a lens of never-ending pain, their excitement at the beginning of the songs they love to jump up and dance to, that iconic and prayerful silence that they give to certain tunes, the ones that help them to transcend the difficulties of the daily trudge… through these attitudes and through their willingness to give a simple dollar that should probably have been spent on bread, they pay a tribute to me that any king would be lucky to receive.
Moreover, they honor themselves. They do this through their unassuming reverence for the joy of the music itself, wherever it happens to pour out. They prove their own royalty, by knowing the secret signs and grips and steps, calling down angels and demons alike, upon an otherwise dull, eventless evening. These people, they create the music. I simply make stabbing motions toward the strings and howl in ways that might possibly cause someone to smile.
Those inside cats, they don’t have to grow, internally, like I do. They don’t have to continually face the assholes who snarl at you, “Get a job!”. They don’t have to stand alone, with iron eyes, against three guys, who are threatening to steal your tips, which essentially means they are threatening to steal your electric bill, your lunches for the week or your rent.
They don’t have to summon up the fortitude and courage to go on playing after someone throws a single coin at you. I’m not talking about when someone tosses a coin at you… but instead, when someone literally throws it at you.
Those are the angry people, the sad, broke, the desperate, the heartless, the heartbroken. Some have more money than sense and some have even more hatred than they have energy to express. They have given up altogether on brotherly love, dismissing it as a pipe dream. They traded it in, years ago, for a new pair of pants and a pack of whatever cigarettes are en vogue, these days. The saddest part is their believing that they got a really sweet deal on those pants.
I still see them, zombies wandering by the drove, hoping to steal someone else’s good time, having forgotten how to generate their own. I see them, every night that I come out here. Honestly, they do get me down, much more than I’d like to admit. I manage to stop it, before they drag me too far into their misery. I cut short that poisonous process by telling myself that it’s their loss. And truly, deep down, I am aware that this is no simple rationalization. I know in fact, that it is the gospel truth; I have seen the light.
I know the warm spaces in which the light dwells and the myriad good things which it illuminates, when the crowds are still, for even the briefest of moments. The eyes betray only a bit of that beautiful secret. The rest is scattered in places you’d probably not think to look. It’s hiding in between the near interactions of people who are completely unaware of one another. It’s under the cars and on the roofs. It’s in the fur of the stray dog and that’s why you pet him, to receive his blessing.
It’s in the handshakes and meals and the laughter and it’s even in the bitter, screamed jealousies of lovers who hurt in love for one another that they have temporarily gone insane. It is in the willing space, given for another to breathe and share, unimpeded by opinion. It is in the sarcasm of the drunks who, while meaning no harm, have become possessed by the trickster gods, their mercurial sarcasm shared loudly and terribly witty things, spewing from the mouths of young men and women who cannot say there own names at the moment, yet somehow manage in the moment to come off like professional standup comedians, saying things that are much funnier than they actually are.
Of course, I still see the police, running full speed to break up the brawls, brutal squabbles, fueled by liquor and fear. I hear the sirens roaring, reminding me that somewhere, something… is going very, very, wrong.
But tonight, I bought an egg roll for a total stranger and we swappedstories of working on construction sites, toiling in the hard noon sun, for an honest day’s wage. We talked about trying to work your way up in the world and about being at peace with that process.
Now, he’s a little less hungry and now, I have some much needed cash in my pocket. And I think that for now, at least for tonight, we are both… O.K.
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Magus (Kevin Trent Boswell)
www.theplasticinfinity.com
www.antiverse.webs.com
www.conjuresound.com
www.cdbaby.com/cd/boswell